chien Stonebirdhead

Gud pudin resipi

Come all ye children, gather near

of christmas pudding have no fear,

we have a new recipe to make it now

with natural flours, - of sheep and cow

 

Grease the inside of one large bowl

if you’ve got one that’s not too foul

find a large spoon, and some good will

as with goodies this bowl we will fill

 

Put in a handful of mixed up nuts

with four feet of flour, from the choicest cuts,

but as beef suet* we will leave out

add character, both ‘randy and stout

 

Whip your nestegg into a froth

and we will make a financial broth

of current dates and last years figs

(shouldn’t lick fingers, don’t be pigs )

 

I almost forgot the sultanas

chopped apple, pear and bananas

jellied fruit, jellied eels and spice

little girls and other things nice.

 

Ground nutmeg if you want some seasoning

and what’s left of the raisin (or was that reasoning?)

A zest of lemon and the peel

hold the table when you reel

Burnt sugar, or was it caramel?

I saw one or both before I fell

 

Throw in sixpence for the chance

or frank, if you live in FFrance

 

Stir like mad, taste it not

put it in another pot

cover it with an i-net - fine

tied tightly with telephone line.

Boil it gently in a bain-marie

or sauna if you find one free

 

Leave in a cupboard for a month or more

top up with brandy through a hole in the door

and when you finally want to eat

run, - if you’ve still got feet.

ps

- But of course - 

I nearly forgot the sauce

whip the eggs and beat the cream

(not as brutal as it would seem)

brandy and sugar, in they go

and little white berries of mistletoe

(could have fallen in by mistake

when a sly kiss you tried to take,

no one will ever know

- either friend or foe)

 

* BSE, Beef Suet Extract -  or mad cow to be exact